Scams & fraud
How to help an older parent avoid scams (without taking over)
Older Australians are targeted heavily by phone and text scams, partly because they’re more likely to answer calls and have savings. But the answer isn’t to take their phone away or check every message. It’s a few settings, a couple of family rules and making it easy to ask before acting.
The short version
The family plan
- Agree a simple rule: call family before paying anyone new.
- Set up a family code word.
- Turn on call and text filtering together.
- Make checking feel normal, never embarrassing.
Start with a conversation, not a lecture
People respond better to “Have you seen this one going around?” than “You need to be careful.” Share a real example, like a fake toll text or a call from “the bank”, and ask whether they’ve had anything like it. Many people have, and talking about it makes them more likely to mention the next one.
Make one thing clear: if they ever lose money, you won’t be angry. Shame is one of the biggest reasons people don’t report scams, or keep paying in the hope of getting money back.
Three family rules that cover most scams
No money to anyone new without a call
Before paying a new account, buying gift cards or moving savings, they call a family member on a number they already know. Not because they can’t decide for themselves, but because a second voice breaks the urgency scammers depend on.
Real organisations can wait
Banks, the ATO, Medicare, the police and telcos will always let you hang up and call back. Anyone who says “don’t hang up” or “don’t tell anyone” is a scammer.
A family code word
Agree a word that any family member in a real emergency will say. It protects against “Hi Mum” texts and calls using cloned voices. See our guide on family emergency scams.
Settings worth doing together
Sit down with their phone and do these with them, explaining each one, rather than doing it for them.
- Silence unknown callers or filter spam calls, so unknown numbers go to voicemail. On iPhone it’s Silence Unknown Callers in the Phone settings. On Android, look for caller ID and spam protection in the Phone app.
- Filter unknown texts in the Messages settings.
- Save important numbers in their contacts with clear names: their bank (from the card), GP, pharmacy, family members, and you.
- Turn on banking app notifications so they see every payment.
- Turn on automatic updates for the phone and apps.
- Ask their telco about extra scam filtering or international call barring.
- Set up two-step verification on their email and myGov, and consider passkeys, which are easier than passwords for many people.
Consider a trusted contact at the bank
Many banks let customers nominate a trusted person or set up alerts for unusual activity. Ask their bank what it offers. Any arrangement should be their choice, made together.
Signs someone may be caught in a scam
- They’re secretive or stressed about phone calls or a new “friend” online.
- They mention an investment, prize, inheritance or job that sounds too good to be true.
- They’re buying gift cards or cryptocurrency, or asking how to.
- Money is moving out of their accounts in unusual ways.
- They’re being asked to keep a matter confidential by a bank, government agency or police officer.
If you notice these, ask gently and without blame. If money has been sent, follow our guide on what to do if you’ve been scammed together, starting with a call to their bank.
Free help and learning
- Be Connected is a free government program from the eSafety Commissioner that teaches online skills, including staying safe from scams, at your own pace.
- IDCARE on 1800 595 160 gives free one-on-one support if personal information has been shared.
- Scamwatch publishes alerts about current scams, which are useful to share with family.
Practise together
Texts, links and QR codes is a free NovaSoft Labs course with six fictional scenarios and an explanation for every answer. Work through it side by side, one question at a time. Pass it to print a completion certificate.
Common questions
Should I take control of their bank accounts or passwords?
Only if they want that and it’s set up properly, for example through the bank’s own arrangements or a formal power of attorney. Sharing passwords informally can cause problems and leaves them less independent.
They keep answering unknown numbers. What can I do?
Turning on call filtering helps a lot, so unknown callers go to voicemail. Explain that real callers leave a message.
They don’t believe it could happen to them.
Most people feel that way until it does. Sharing real stories, and making checking a normal family habit rather than a judgement, tends to work better than warnings.
Sources
This guide is general information, not legal or financial advice. If you think you’ve lost money or personal information, contact your bank and the services named above straight away.
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